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Post by caffine10x on Sept 13, 2002 22:14:48 GMT -5
Here is a list of rejected Kool-Aid
10 Rejected Flavors Of Kool-Aid
1. Drunkenberry Punch
2. Strawberry Escargo
3. Tastes Like Teen Spirit
4. Toxic Yellow Surprise
5. Roadkill Red
6. Rocka-fishy Tuna
7. Chocolate Fudge Ripple
8. Picklejuice
9. Shrimp Cocktail
10. Sea Monkeys!
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Post by caffine10x on Sept 13, 2002 22:15:12 GMT -5
I will try to post daily jokes on this thread
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Post by The Silence on Sept 13, 2002 22:16:36 GMT -5
Sea monkeys are yummy!
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Post by caffine10x on Sept 13, 2002 22:18:21 GMT -5
how do you know?
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Post by The Silence on Sept 13, 2002 22:19:10 GMT -5
don't ask...
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Post by caffine10x on Sept 13, 2002 22:19:18 GMT -5
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Post by ~SC~ on Sept 14, 2002 13:11:00 GMT -5
lol, i'll post jokes whenever i remember one
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Post by dietspam16 on Sept 17, 2002 22:26:32 GMT -5
my question is...(insert dramatic music) are those just humorous or were they truly proposed?
cause at one point jello actually released choclate, asparugus, and some other flavor but the three almost instalty flopped
choclate doesn't sound bad,, say did corbin ever join this site?
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Post by Alien_Anomaly on Sept 19, 2002 21:41:01 GMT -5
no he didn't he joined my forum tho
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Post by caffine10x on Oct 7, 2002 17:25:38 GMT -5
Here you guys! Here is even more jokes!
TEXTBill Gates Eternity!!!!
Bill Gates dies and goes to hell. Satan greets him, "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever."
Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are tormented and tortured.
He then takes him to a massive colosseum where thousands of people are chased about and devoured by starving lions.
Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a beautiful young blonde with an alluring look on her face, sitting at a table on which there is a bottle of the finest wine. To Bill's delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation, Bill says "I'll take this option."
"Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room.
Satan locks the room after Bill. As he turns around, he bumps into Lucifer.
"That was Bill Gates!" cried Lucifer. "Why did you give him the best place of all?"
"That's what everyone thinks," snickered Satan. "The bottle has a hole in it and the girl hasn't."
"What about the PC?"
"It's got Windows 95!" laughed Satan. "And it's missing three keys."
"Which three?"
"Control, Alt and Delete."
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Post by The Silence on Oct 7, 2002 18:13:16 GMT -5
wouldn't you only need to take out one of those three keys for the punishment to be equally effective?
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Post by ~SC~ on Oct 7, 2002 21:31:39 GMT -5
yeah, i read that joke before somewhere
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Post by caffine10x on Oct 18, 2002 21:51:27 GMT -5
Even more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The following were actually taken from recent classified ads in newspapers:
FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL - 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG
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FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 YEARS OLD. UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG.
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1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer
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AMANA WASHER $100. OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.
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SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE... ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.
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FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD - PART STUPID DOG
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2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES: One 5-finger, One 3-finger, PAIR: $15
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TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS OWN 1988 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800
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COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED... ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.
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83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000
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STAR WARS JOB OF THE HUT -- $15
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SOFT and GENITAL BATH TISSUES OR FACIAL TISSUE 89 cents
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GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.
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FULL SIZED MATTRESS. 20 YR. WARRANTY. LIKE NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL.
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FREE 1 CAN OF PORK and BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.
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FOR SALE: LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) - $50
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NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED *************** CALL CHUBBIE ***************
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BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING "WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"
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SHAKESPEARE'S PIZZA - FREE CHOPSTICKS
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FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG. LOOKS LIKE A RAT... BEEN OUT A WHILE.. BETTER BE REWARD.
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HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"
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GET A LITTLE JOHN: THE TRAVELING URINAL HOLDS 2 1/2 BOTTLES OF BEER.
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HARRISBURG POSTAL EMPLOYEES GUN CLUB
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GEORGIA PEACHES CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.
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NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE SLIGHTLY STAINED
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FREE: FARM KITTENS. READY TO EAT.
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AMERICAN FLAG 60 STARS - POLE INCLUDED $100
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TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.
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EXERCISE EQUIPMENT: QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS and BOX SPRINGS -$175.
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OUR SOFA SEATS THE WHOLE MOB AND IT'S MADE OF 100% ITALIAN LEATHER.
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JOINING NUDIST COLONY! MUST SELL WASHER and DRYER $300.
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LAWYER SAYS CLIENT IS NOT THAT GUILTY.
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ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER
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GROUND BEAST: 99 cents lb.
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GAS CLOUD CLEARS OUT TACO BELL.
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OPEN HOUSE BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON FREE COFFEE and DONUTS
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KELLOGG'S POT TARTS - $1.99 box
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FULLY COOKED BONELESS SMOKED MAN - $2.09 lb.
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FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.
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Post by caffine10x on Oct 18, 2002 21:54:08 GMT -5
There's more........................
Actual bumper stickers found on actual cars:
* Horn broken. Watch for finger. * Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot. * All generalizations are false. * Cover me. I'm changing lanes. * I brake for no apparent reason. * Learn from your parents' mistakes - use birth control. * I'm not as think as you drunk I am. * Forget about World Peace...Visualize using your turn signal. * We have enough youth, how about a fountain of Smart? * He who laughs last thinks slowest. * Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. * It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you. * Auntie Em, Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy. * Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. * Time is what keeps everything from happening at once. * I love cats...they taste just like chicken. * Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. * Forget the Joneses, I keep us up with the Simpsons. * Born free...Taxed to death. * The more people I meet, the more I like my dog. * Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot. * Rehab is for quitters. * I get enough exercise just pushing my luck. * Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let him sleep. * All men are idiots, and I married their King. * Jack Kevorkian for White House Physician. * Work is for people who don't know how to fish. * Montana -- At least our cows are sane! * I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian. * Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition. * If you don't like the news, go out and make some. * When you do a good deed, get a receipt--in case heaven is like the IRS.. * Sorry, I don't date outside my species. * No radio - Already stolen. * Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs. * Real women don't have hot flashes, they have power surges. * I took an IQ test and the results were negative. * Where there's a will, I want to be in it. * OK, who stopped payment on my reality check? * Few women admit their age; Fewer men act it. * I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it. * Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW. * Tell me to 'stuff it' - I'm a taxidermist. * IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got. * Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students. * It's lonely at the top, but you eat better. * According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist. * Some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill. * Pride is what we have. Vanity is what others have. * A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory. * Reality? Is that where the pizza delivery guy comes from? * How can I miss you if you won't go away? * Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear. * Give me ambiguity or give me something else. * We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse. * Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot. * Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. * Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies. * Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes. * Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy. * Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. * i souport publik edekashun. * Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home. * Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder... * There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't. * Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word? * Ever stop to think and forget to start again? * Keep honking...I'm reloading. * Caution: I drive like you do.
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Post by caffine10x on Oct 18, 2002 21:54:54 GMT -5
The first one is really funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ^_^
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