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Post by bezzerkker on Feb 28, 2004 1:45:40 GMT -5
starlight starbright wish I may, wish I might on the first star I see tonight as it rises from the hills and the wind gives me chills but alas, the air blows from a vent and the star is crashing, hell-bent a man-made light in the sky creating just one more lie fake-light false-bright scream I may, cry I might on the lie revealed tonight
this one has been sorta rolling around in my head for awhile. It was sorta inspired by a sattelite thing that I saw during summer camp last year, and sometime this year when I remembered it. I also remembered the first four lines of this poem, which is part of a children's rhyme. The first things that I came up with were the original-esque lines, and the last four lines well, hope you people enjoyed it, feel free to comment
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Post by Antid on Mar 1, 2004 21:41:29 GMT -5
Very nice
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Post by Arachis on Mar 2, 2004 14:23:18 GMT -5
not bad.....
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Post by bezzerkker on Mar 4, 2004 18:58:24 GMT -5
thanks very much for the opinions
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Post by Trinket on Mar 12, 2004 13:33:20 GMT -5
Wow, I absolutely loved that poem. Do the world a favour, and never stop writing. The world could use some beauty and talent put to good use.
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Post by bezzerkker on Mar 13, 2004 17:24:49 GMT -5
wow, thanks alot and don't thank me for writing poetry, my girlfriend deserves more credit being as she has gotten me to do it in my free time
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